“The surreal D&D podcast for people who don’t like parties.”

— Gustavé Dore (no relation to Gustave Doré)


SCHEDULE: On Hiatus (More soon!)

Follow us at Twitter for updates!



Season Three - The Caverns of Jef

Season 3.jpeg

Season 3, Episode 7 (of 6)

The climactic conclusion of Horkhauser's quest to save Ozzy without screwing up everything! (Warning: Contains screwing up everything.)

Season 3, Episode 6

Horkhauser is cornered, with only a ten-year-old barbarian and a loud-mouthed magic dog at his side. Is this the climactic climax of The Caverns of Jef? IS IT?

Season 3, Episode 5

Things get bloody. Blood everywhere! Really, that's all you need to know. Oh yeah, and there's a cave. So that's two things you need to know.

Season 3, Episode 4

Should we tell you about the fight between the killer tree and the gelatinous cube? Or searching the bloody body of a dead Muttyn Troll for clues? Both sound kind of gross, huh?

Season 3, Episode 3

Horkhauser rides Jef's floating balloon-house to the island of Svintermere, the source of Ozzy's distress signal. But the ghost horse has cursed Horkhauser with a "wobble-wobble," and the trees are getting angry. (Does any of this make sense? It doesn't really, does it?)

Season 3, Episode 2

The one where Horkhauser ruins everything, disappoints everyone, then finds a new purpose in life! #punchmyuncleintheface​

Season 3, Episode 1

Welcome to Season 3, The Caverns of Jef! So close to returning home, Horkhauser is ambushed by the mysterious but clunky Jef, the stealthiest giant Muttyn Troll you've ever met, and he has a potentially violent proposition for him.

AUDIO PODCAST VERSION HERE


Season Two - The Great Cow Chase

Season 2.jpeg

Season 2, Episode 6

Pinned down in the dairy, Horkhauser has one last chance to save the giant cow from destruction! But what if it was [SPOILER] all along?! The Great Cow Chase comes to its creamy conclusion!

Season 2, Episode 4

The cow is overrun with battling Bonks, the "Security Room" just makes you feel comforted, and Horkhauser's only ally is a grouchy dwarf as the giant dairy marches slowly to its own destruction. This all makes sense, right?

Season 2, Episode 5

Horkhauser jumps dimensions through a bonk-infested dairy to save a giant cow from falling into a volcano! Oh, sorry! “Spoilers!”

Season 2, Episode 3

Having been captured by the Bonks, Horkhauser now has to-- WTF?! GIANT SPIDER!! SWEET HOLY MOTHER OF FUGNUGGETS A SERIOUSLY SCARY GIANT F*CKING SPIDER!!!

Season 2, Episode 2

Lost in a wasteland of trash and spiders, Horkauser finds... Does it matter? Seriously, a wasteland of trash and spiders is awesome! What more do you need?

Season 2, Episode 1

On his way home, Horkhauser gets hijacked in his hotel by a mysterious figure from his mysterious past* with a mysterious mission to a mysterious cow.

AUDIO PODCAST VERSION HERE


Season One - Burbi’s Last Burble

Season 1.jpeg

Season 1, Episode 14

The season finale! Horkhauser has one last-ditch chance to beat Busbi Burbi and restore the plate to its rightful place. He'll just need a tractor...

Season 1, Episode 13

After a riddle match with a tentacled eyeball, Horkhauser finds himself in the nerve center of the villainous Busbi Burbi -- and a tacky restaurant with live entertainment...

Season 1, Episode 12

Our special for Gen Con Online! In the wee hours before his long rest, Horkhauser sees a way to end his horsey curse forever…

Season 1, Episode 11

The giant tsunami is coming, and Grimtankerous dumps Horkhauser in a boat and says start rowing! But the shore is far, the sea is mined, and the imps are mined…

Season 1, Episode 10

Horkhauser has teamed up with Grimtankerous on his mysterious ship, but their journey may be in trouble when they encounter a strange matrix of devils…

 

Season 1, Episode 9

In the secret caves under the woods, Horkhause finally finds Grimtankerous. Or part of him, anyway…

Season 1, Episode 8

Horkhauser seems to have escaped from the town of cowards, but now he faces a dangerous, action-packed journey through a dark forest…

Season 1, Episode 7

Horkhauser is well and truly stuck in the town of cowards, and his only way out is through the help of a man named Cliver Flea: ham wizard…

 

Season 1, Episode 6

Horkhauser finds himself trapped in a town full of cowards with no way out. Does the secret to escape lie in the magical Ham Mill? Or with a hairy troll who runs a day spa?

Season 1, Episode 5

Horkhauser seems closer than ever to reaching the fabled Restaurant, but now he must contend with a pair of hungry Jabberwockies…

Season 1, Episode 4

Horkahuser finds himself trapped in a giant eyeball on a balloon ride over a landscape of garbage. Yes, you read that right…

 

Season 1, Episode 3

Horkhauser reaches his destination, but after fighting through a field of mushroom men and an explosive-happy Mock Gryphon, will he choose the ladder to sadness…

Season 1, Episode 2

Surly Reverse-Burglar Horkhauser gets closer to the Maze, but can he stop a furniture-wielding mob with a Wand of Too Many Pigs?

Season 1, Episode 1

The Murder Maze begins, as Surly Reverse-Burglar Horkhauser sets off on a mission. But can he survive... THE RAIN OF CHAIRS?

AUDIO PODCAST VERSION HERE

Hey look.

This button has art.

Wow.